Dr. Linda De Villers (www.DrLindaDeVillers.com) is the author of Love Skills – A Fun, Upbeat Guide to Sex-cessful Relationships – a wonderful book providing step-by-step programs for sexual fun, adventure and growth! Dr. Linda and Dr. Diana have been friends and colleagues since 1991. They both share this in common: Linda’s mother died at 100 in April and Diana’s died at 95 in August of 2017. Both docs were blessed with secure attachment in their families of origin! This is a positive because our attachment experience influences whether we see ourselves as lovable. If a secure person is with an anxious one, be receptive to his or her desire for security and allay fears when second-guessing or smothering seems to be going on. If with an avoidant who is clamming up, talk about how you can give him the space he may not even realize he wants…get him talking openly! Dr. Linda, who has done research on touch, speaks about getting in touch with touch. We spoke about touch in a baby’s life, how different cultures embrace touch or don’t, the distinction between sensuality and sexuality, and the limitations and benefits of caressing exercises. Body image issues plague many women who believe that they have to have a beautiful body to be alluring and enjoy pleasure. Sometimes it may be a way to avoid being sexual; indeed, a “self-image neurosis.” In order to love another, it’s important to respect his choice of you as a worthy lover. With this kind of self-respect, it’s easier to forget precise physical boundaries in the warm, sensual, sexual world that two people make together!
Click below to listen to the interview (approx. one hour):